“I don’t know what T shirt to wear?”
“I can’t get into my clothes by myself!”
These sort of statements can be really tedious when whining out of the mouth of a competent four year old just as you are trying to pry your eyes open in the small hours of the morning.
On top of this we then ran out of PJ tops. Trying to find cotton PJs in a small town was actually much harder than I thought it would be. Polyester this, and polyester that – fine if you would like to sleep in plastic! So the solution then was for my oldest son Zak to simply put on a long top – fine for winter, but what about summer? – you guessed it, a T shirt. Zak and I then chatted through the possibility of him just wearing boxes to bed and wa la…we came up with the winning formula! Now all this may not sound incredible, and I didn’t really fully get the implications until the next morning when Zak bounced out of bed, put a pair of shorts on, and was dressed within seconds – he was impressed! I then thought, if its good for the big boy, its good for the smaller one, and there vanished the whining about T shirts and getting dressed in the morning – yay – a whinge free morning!!
After this discovery I then read an article about bed bugs and the need for the bed to be aired out to dehydrate and obliterate the little critters – and the penny dropped – not only is the T shirt and boxes for night – and then for the next day – so convenient – but it also means that their bed clothes are being changed daily rather than the normal weekly change of PJs – got to be better for you!! When other people had told me about going camping and wearing their fresh clothes for night clothes my immediate reaction was yuck! but I would then put on my PJs that I had been wearing all week – 7 days verses 1 night and one day!! Another lady had told me also how her mornings were so manic she would sleep in her clothes so once awake she just got out of bed and got going – and again my thought was one of repulsion – how could anyone sleep in jeans!!  Its amazing how you can just assume what people are wearing and not realise that their trackpants are only slightly thicker than your PJs, and they would be worn less than your PJ pants!
Now I’m on the look out for shorts for me that can be worn to bed and then for during the day….

You may not be able to see them, but in my children’s hands are secret spy phones!! – well this is what they were told to find all through the store by the amazing Tony Friend pictured – isn’t it cool when someone’s name fits them so perfectly! I had arrived at the store half-way through my shopping stint so the boys were getting a bit restless. I had tried placing them on a mat but I hadn’t noticed the overhanging sleeping bags that had gold sewn in the seams, that were just too tempting for a three year old not to try to swing off! With a few screeches, and fire coming out my ears I was tossing up whether or not to flag the fabulous sale and leave before I had more to pay in damages than in bargains when along breezed Tony.

“Can I help?”, he cheerfully asked.

Well….this wasn’t the time to be polite and beat around the bush – I had my own mission to accomplish and I couldn’t do that with two restless units of energy waiting to be plugged into trouble rolling around on the floor.

“Yes, can you deal with these two so I can shop in peace please?”
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There done it. I’ve admitted I’m not coping with my offspring to a complete stranger! Quick as a flash, Tony got down to the boys level and with big animated eyes said that there were spies in the store and he needed the two of them to help him find all the special phones that had been planted in the store. They were his special secret agents and they had a very important mission to complete! Well, he didn’t know that my children don’t watch TV, read comics or other fiction books and would never have heard of spies before in their lives, but they captured the fun in his voice and just set off with the new found freedom of roaming the entire store, diving under clothes racks and running around squealing with delight at finding plastic coat hanger numbers! I was ecstatic at now being able to shop in peace but my ‘Yeah ha!’ balloon popped when I realised that now I actually needed help with deciding what to purchase! This was a bit of a dilemma – have my kids supervised or make an uninformed buy. While I pondered this, Tony reappeared and asked if I needed any help – what a man! So, with kids running up to him with spy gadgets and a mother who needs to make the purchase quickly but with lots of information Tony was able to manage the whole package effortlessly – well I found out he did have four kids of his own – so he had the kid skills there!
Twenty minutes later the boys had completed their important mission and not only came away with memories of special spy phones but were also given a hacky sack each – they were too very happy little people – with one very happy mummy who had a big bag of bargains to carry out! – thank you Tony – you’re a star!

Phew! – my angel has returned!
Lacking sleep – yikes we’ve got a monster in the house!

Yesterday morning Zak(6 yrs) erupted out of his room like some tormented demon! He crashed into Callum’s room before 7am, and proceeded to enrage Callum. “Mummy hug” were shouted from the room as I drowsily became aware of the human volcano exploding in the room next door. Lots of crashing, and shrieking, and finally after much yelling on my behalf, Zak let Callum out of his room to come running to the safety of his mother. Zak chased him down the hallway shouting and screaming as he ran (I could almost see the black clouds with lightening flashing out them over his head), and I breathed a sigh of exhaustion, and the day had only started! I then proceeded to go and get Callum dressed after repeatedly telling Zak to do the same which he ignored and continued roaring around the house. As I entered Callum’s room I was hit with the results of a storm as the spare bed was disheveled; toys were all over Callum’s bed, and the coverings on the chair were sprawled around the room. The contents of a big black rubbish bag full of unwanted stuff to give away was strewn around the room, and books covered the floor from the bookshelf. Zak was told to come and clean up the mess but after several screeches, tears and an inability to even stay in one spot was evident, I finished dressing Callum and headed for the kitchen. Breakfast was full of tears and moaning, pouting and general fussing. Bryce commented that it was going to be a loooong day! Which is was! Fortunately Zak realised that fussing and whining was giving him a headache, and settled into his schoolwork and spent the rest of the day doing jobs to earn the points he had accummulated off the behaviour chart from the mornings tantruming and misdemeanors. I found out that he had chosen to go to sleep after 8pm,(although who really knows what time he did actually go to sleep if he was awake to know what the time was!) even though he had been put to bed really early at 6:30pm for obnoxious behaviour. Callum spent most of his day avoiding Zak by being outside, as he didn’t want to be the object that was kicked and shoved like other things in the house were. I felt absolutely frazzled by the end of the day, and we were all happy to put the yawning monster to bed, hoping the angel would emerge the next morning!

Summary of my tired monster:
* controlling
* inconsiderate
* grumpy
* cant concentrate
* cries easily
* defiant
* destructive
* angry/aggressive
* selfish
* unreasonable
* irrational
* reactive (nuclear!!!)
* blames everyone else for his problems

Well rested – the angel returns!

Zak must have gone straight to sleep when put to bed at 7pm as here is the difference. He woke up at 7am, read some books, got dressed, set the table, including putting the food out and rinsing apples. He waited until I was awake (7:45am – Callum hadn’t been angelic and woke up three times in the night) then came in to say what he had done. I hadn’t even heard him get up and get dressed. Three smily faces were put on his behaviour chart, then he helped me prepare the rest of the breakfast, then went and got Callum up without any screeching, made my bed, helped Callum up to the table, bibbed Callum up, and waited patiently while breakfast was dished out – both kids smiling and singing in the interim. Zak then proceeded to get his schoolwork done without being asked, and subsequently went into town with his Dad and Callum, and acted like a star the whole time. Who would have thought that sleep could have made such a difference!
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Summary of rested angel:
* considerate
* helpful
* thoughtful
* on task
* pleasant to be around
* kind
* compliant
* focused on making other people happy
* happy
* affectionate
* sharing

Lacking sleep – yikes we’ve got a monster in the house!
​
Yesterday morning Zak(6 yrs) erupted out of his room like some tormented demon! He crashed into Callum’s room before 7am, and proceeded to enrage Callum. “Mummy hug” were shouted from the room as I drowsily became aware of the human volcano exploding in the room next door. Lots of crashing, and shrieking, and finally after much yelling on my behalf, Zak let Callum out of his room to come running to the safety of his mother. Zak chased him down the hallway shouting and screaming as he ran (I could almost see the black clouds with lightening flashing out them over his head), and I breathed a sigh of exhaustion, and the day had only started! I then proceeded to go and get Callum dressed after repeatedly telling Zak to do the same which he ignored and continued roaring around the house. As I entered Callum’s room I was hit with the results of a storm as the spare bed was disheveled; toys were all over Callum’s bed, and the coverings on the chair were sprawled around the room. The contents of a big black rubbish bag full of unwanted stuff to give away was strewn around the room, and books covered the floor from the bookshelf. Zak was told to come and clean up the mess but after several screeches, tears and an inability to even stay in one spot was evident, I finished dressing Callum and headed for the kitchen. Breakfast was full of tears and moaning, pouting and general fussing. Bryce commented that it was going to be a loooong day! Which it was! Fortunately Zak realised that fussing and whining was giving him a headache, and settled into his schoolwork and spent the rest of the day doing jobs to earn the points he had accummulated off the behaviour chart from the mornings tantruming and misdemeanors. I found out that he had chosen to go to sleep after 8pm,(although who really knows what time he did actually go to sleep if he was awake to know what the time was!) even though he had been put to bed really early at 6:30pm for obnoxious behaviour. Callum spent most of his day avoiding Zak by being outside, as he didn’t want to be the object that was kicked and shoved like other things in the house were. I felt absolutely frazzled by the end of the day, and we were all happy to put the yawning monster to bed, hoping the angel would emerge the next morning!
Summary of my tired monster:

• controlling
• inconsiderate
• grumpy
• couldn’t concentrate
• cried easily
• defiant
• destructive
• angry/aggressive
• selfish
• unreasonable
• irrational
• reactive (nuclear!!!)
• blamed everyone else for his problems

Well rested – the angel returns!
Zak must have gone straight to sleep when put to bed at 7pm as here is the difference. He woke up at 7am, read some books, got dressed, set the table, including putting the food out and rinsing apples. He waited until I was awake (7:45am – Callum hadn’t been angelic and woke up three times in the night) then came in to say what he had done. I hadn’t even heard him get up and get dressed. Three smily faces were put on his behaviour chart, then he helped me prepare the rest of the breakfast, then went and got Callum up without any screeching, made my bed, helped Callum up to the table, bibbed Callum up, and waited patiently while breakfast was dished out – both kids smiling and singing in the interim. Zak then proceeded to get his schoolwork done without being asked, and subsequently went into town with his Dad and Callum, and acted like a star the whole time. Who would have thought that sleep could have made such a difference!
Summary of rested angel:

• considerate
• helpful
• thoughtful
• on task
• pleasant to be around
• kind
• compliant
• focused on making other people happy
• happy
• affectionate
• sharing

Shop Assistant of the Week goes to Gwen from Chances Takanini!
After my last encounter with the worst assistant of the week (who could have entered Zak’s book of unlikely friendships), it was such a contrast to then be privileged to be assisted by the remarkable Gwen. Even before I entered the store, Gwen had welcomed Zak and was instantly listening to his incessant chatter about the lastest book he had been given by his wonderful Aunty Kylie. Callum was also interacted with for the brief few seconds he stood still. I was able to look around the store without a kid-appendage and worrying about the small fry making a runner for the front door as soon as I entered the changing room. Naturally the kids were both sardined into the changing room when other customers entered the store, but when I became the sole customer again they were able to be released to assist Gwen again. Both were able to ferry clothes from the booth to the counter with the words, ‘too small’, or ‘too big’ or ‘just not mummy’. Both boys were kept busy being ‘really helpful’, and Zak took great pride in selecting items saying, ‘These are the colours mummy likes.’ We all came out of the store content with our experience, knowing that the shop assistant really is the one who can channel the boundless energy of boys into a source of help or hindrance. Gwen you’re a star! 

“You should keep your offspring under control…if you can.”
This was said to me today by a female sales assistant at a clothing store. A huge smile adorned her face and I simply could not work out whether she was joking or not. It doesn’t help that my brain doesn’t function instantly when in a state of shock. My natural reaction was to laugh, just assuming that someone who was supposed to be keeping customers happy and in their store, couldn’t have just been blunt and obnoxious. The other reaction was to simply ignore it, thinking that if she had actually been serious then she obviously was not a parent who had been shopping with small children before – and therefore was acting like a complete ignoramus and worthy of defying.
To set the scene. Zak, 6 years, and Callum 2.5 years (both boys – an important thing to know) had already endured 3 hours of one shopping mall already and this was their second. Outside the clothing shop I had given them a short break and they had been able to play rapturously  in a ride-on icecream truck before they were herded back into the store to see how their aunty was getting on with her clothes selections. Once in the changing room area they would normally have been able to make faces at themselves in the mirrors, and roll and crawl around a spare cubicle. Unfortunately the cubicles all had to be used and Callum then decided, “Why on earth am I in this shop when I could be on the icecream truck”, and bolted for the front doors. Of course I ran after him and dragged him back in. My sister needed a different size of an item which I went to get, leaving behind both children lying under the door of my sister’s cubicle chatting away to her. As I approached the cubicle again I was given the order by the salesperson to keep my kids under control… or was she joking? How could you be serious and say that sort of thing with a full smile? Why would an assistant say that to a customer?If I hadn’t been so shocked I should have asked her right then and there if she was trying in a warped way to be funny. As I walked out of the store I ummed and ahhed about clarifying it with her but decided not to – who really wants to know the full opinion of someone who either has a warped since of humour or is completely clueless about small males and shopping – late in the afternoon! But then…I have a habit of taking criticism way too seriously and personally – was it a joke?
Parents – what would you have thought and done?  

Zak has only just turned six – evidence supplied below and already he is fast becoming a phenomenal shopper! Today he showed another mum how to get the sizing right for gumboots for her son. This had followed promptly after she had said a few expletives and stated that gumboots should be made transparent so you can see how far the toe is from the end. Obviously Zak had learnt from the best  and told her to put her son’s foot on the sole of the boot – which I commend her for – she did. However, this is minor compared to the shopping marathon Zak had endured only a couple of days before! I had a moment of complete and utter madness – (it was actually desperation as I’ve got limited winter clothes) – and decided I would attempt to go clothes shopping again with a toddler and 6 yr old. I had completed the styles test below the night before discovering after 41 years what type of clothes are really ‘me’ – I’m a creative natural. With this new knowledge I felt confident I was ready to launch out.
http://www.thechicfashionista.com/fashion-style-quiz.html#Quiz
The last time I attempted to go shopping with two kids it took me days to recover, and I had promised myself I would wait several years before ever putting myself through that self-inflicted torture again! With a few bribes up my sleeve we got through the morning and then we came to the store Max. An hour later (with a toilet stop half way – don’t you hate that!!!) Zak was having an absolute blast choosing clothes he knew mummy would like the colour of – red, turquoise and black, and bringing them to the changing rooms. Even Callum got into the swing of it and was carting the clothes out of the changing room saying, ‘no,no,no’ – his favourite word of course!! (alongside ‘Mama’ and ‘digger’ – no connection! ). I’m just kicking myself now that I didn’t take a pic of the two in action – next time!! Callum had managed to help himself to the Max stickers behind the counter and had them plastered all over his front – I managed to get stickered in the process also  Angela, the Max assistant, was incredible and learnt a lot of information about sharks throughout the process –  Zak had earnt himself a book on sharks from the previous store – which worked a treat for the stores leading up to the Max stop. This definitely was a great purchase! Unfortunately the shopping binge was short-lived as I had to beat the parking meter warden to my car, and I had to forgo the talk about the other great deals Max had going in the store. Four purchases later we were heading out of Whangarei with three very satisfied shoppers – Zak – mummy had bought the things he had chosen, Callum –  had scored a myriad of stickers and was integral to helping mummy, and of course, mummy – actually came out of the store with more than just frazzled nerves and a headache! Even after all this success, Zak was still open to the idea of what could be done better next time, and was handed the colour palate booklet showing which colours suited me (based on the seasons Winter, Summer, Autumn and Spring from the company Colour Me Beautiful). He learnt that next time he could go around the store and find items that mummy not only liked but that matched her colour booklet. Style will be next, alongside Shape – his future wife will most certainly thank me!!!

Journey begins
I have just come back from a trip to the South Island of NZ with a friend and my two children – Zak aged 5 – nearly 6, and Callum 2 yrs 3 months. Below is a pic of the fun just beginning! You can see that Zak is fully equipped to be self-sufficient with his leap pad and headphones – but what you cant see is that he is carrying a full arsenal of books and toys for Callum – I’m always forever hopeful that at some stage I will actually get to do some reading of my own – and what better place than on a plane! Well I did manage to get a few pages read after realizing my friend Lyn was simply watching the screen and dozing behind me – obviously bored and in need of some kid entertainment – so we swapped seats – what bliss! I only realised later that she was actually recovering from the shock of missing our first flight (misread the ticket with our departure time on it), and was battling a fever brought on from having the flu!
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Invercargill
Well, the trip progressed with a visit to my grandmother, the Invercargill museum and park. Invercargill outdid itself weather wise, as was informed by my aunt, the day before leaving to head south, that I should pack all my winter gear – so my bags was bursting at their seams with thermals, jeans and the like. Feeling very prepared I was therefore not expecting to be greeted by a tee-shirt, short-wearing aunt who had just emerged from gardening in the sun!

Dunedin – on the way
All was good though, as once we headed toward Dunedin we needed our winter woollies.  On our way we stopped to view the waterfalls that line that route and I was amazed how fast you can walk with a toddler when you have a person holding a hand each side – he swung down steps and enjoyed every moment of it. However, I didn’t fully understand the difference until I walked with him by myself – and we were certainly on the slow coach then! Its amazing how many fascinating grey stones and moss a 2yr old can find on a path! I tried to just soak in the sun, enjoying the leisurely stroll and not focus on the ever increasing distance between Lyn and Zak ahead of me! Of course, this put us behind schedule but I became more and more aware of the need to also be on toddler time and let him relish in new discoveries too.

Arrival in Dunedin 
Penguins, seals and albatross
Penguins, seals and albatross were all gooed at, although again Callum was more fascinated by the grey stones lining the beach than the seal that was only a couple of metres away from him! He was also very adamant that night that the bird he had just seen waddle up near him was a duck not a penguin, and pointed at the sign with a picture of the penguins and said, ‘duck’ and then pointed to where he had seen the penguin waddle passed him and again very firmly stated ‘duck’ – there was no fooling him!

Larnach’s Castle
Next on the agenda was Larnach’s Castle which I’m pleased I had seen before as spent most of my time making sure Callum didn’t run off or duck under a rope and destroy something.

Olveston House    www.olveston.co.nz
Olveston House matched this experience although worse as I hadn’t already visited it previously, so I really did want to take it all in. We had to be part of a guided tour but after five minutes the guide was continuously peering in my direction with comments of, “Don’t let him into the other room”, when he had moved 20 cms from my leg, and “Please make sure he doesn’t touch anything or lean on anything”, when his head brushed the cord fencing off the exhibits. After several screeches when I tried to pick Callum up, I had the sinking feeling that yet again I would miss out on something I was really looking forward to. Thankfully at this precise moment the tour guide announced – “for your own comfort I think it will be best if you and your family are on your own tour and can go at the pace of your toddler.” I wasn’t quite sure how this would all pan out, but I soon discovered that the pace of a toddler means that you take 20 minutes to do a tour that would normally take 60 minutes! Hence I bought the booklet and managed to read two pages of it on the plane! Callum also decided that the trip was also the time for some teeth to move around also and I had several nights of broken sleep – resulting in late starts. This also meant that I found it hard to play happy mummy on the plane when I was constantly being interrupted – Callum doesn’t understand the concept of redeeming his little self and making up for taking mummy’s ‘Me time’, and sabotaging memorable moments  All this I suppose, makes the transition from being out and about, to then being back home to the grind that bit easier – at least at home you can send them both out to the sandpit and write your blog in peace! They say a change is as good a break, and yes it does break the monotony of the housework grind – but I don’t think travelling with children is something I would put in the restful and relaxing category! – bless their little cotton socks!